By now, if you’ve read a few basic articles, you will be aware of your subconscious mind and various limiting beliefs/complexes rooted in them. Well, at least you’re aware that you should be aware. Or you just like to read these articles and not actually do anything. Either way.
Meditation has been long studied as a good thing, and you can go look some of those studies up if you don’t believe me. For those who feel it is more myth than science, understand that it’s like exercise for your brain–keep doing it consistently and your brain will get healthier. Your brain is more important than your body. Without your body you can still seek pleasure, without your brain you are no different than your vacuum cleaner. It isn’t really that remarkable to me that people don’t talk about meditation as a fundamental property of mental health because the mental health of most people absolutely sucks. It’s common for people to care way more about what other people think of them than what they think of themselves, to want what they can’t have, and to be utterly miserable over things like a shirt getting ruined in a dryer. If that’s not a road paved to misery, I don’t know what is.
There are a ton of ways to meditate, but they all come back to the same point: consistent, unyielding focus on a particular idea. The most broad form of meditation (and in general the best) is simply sitting down and clearing your mind of thoughts. It’s a pretty simple idea, but–again I’ll say it–just because something is simple doesn’t mean that it is easy. When your mind drifts from the simple thought, you calmly re-focus it back on your particular idea. As you improve, you’ll be able to keep it focused and stop it from drifting altogether, and this is like curing Superman’s weakness to Kryptonite.
If you take meditation seriously, you’ll see after a few days that little things don’t bother you as much. You’ll find that the world slows down, you’ll find that you’re more relaxed and confident, you’ll find that you can breathe the air a little easier, and your ability to focus on things for long periods of time is both more efficient and longer-lasting. It’s like all of the magic pills you read about on the internet, but a real thing. Unlike the pills on the internet, it doesn’t happen right away. But when has anything you’ve ever wanted happened right away? It’s as if your dream job landed in your mailbox the second you realized it’s what you wanted to do, or your soulmate appeared in front of you the second you got lonely. Things that seem easy are almost always things to ignore the hell out of.
Meditation is also the beginning of true change. By focusing intensely on a particular idea, even if it’s only ten minutes a day, you rewire your brain to think differently. Let’s say that, through methods you’ve read about in this blog or a worthy book, you’ve discovered that you have a limiting belief which has you thinking you don’t deserve a great sexual partner–whatever your definition of ‘great’ is. Meditating on “I deserve a great person in my life” actually rewires your brain to believe that (slowly). Before it thought: “I deserve just a seven out of ten. That falls right into what I deserve, exactly no better than that.” But you’re now consciously telling it to change the way it thinks, and it will listen. Change your thought habits, change your life.
The best analogy I’ve heard for fixing a limiting belief or a complex is like shoveling. Common knowledge dictates that 21 days is the exact length of time to change a habit. Instead of that, think of it as digging a hole for a treasure chest. Depending on how long it’s been in existence and how deeply your subconscious has buried it, you might have to dig for a long time (i.e. a lot longer than 21 days). But if you keep digging, a little bit every day, you will find it. Those that give up because they “forget” just didn’t want to change that badly, and those that give up because it’s “hard” also didn’t want to change that badly (for help improving desire, see Definiteness of Purpose). But those that keep digging just win, it’s honestly that simple.
I’ll update other ways to meditate, but the best kind is simply to sit down in a comfortable position and a quiet space, then set a timer for about ten minutes and focus on your breathing. At first, just close your eyes, then watch your breathing with the view of an observer: you just watch your thoughts as if they were physical objects in your head and let them do whatever they want. After the ten minutes are up (let the timer go off–don’t look at the time in the middle of meditation), ask yourself how well you think you did compared to your goal. If you feel you could have done better, set another timer for five minutes and do better. Do this twice a day and you’ll see better results, but take it slow and don’t expect immediate change.
After a few days, you’ll already feel a little better. A few weeks later, you’ll naturally have a more comfortable outlook on life. Once you’re doing it consistently for a few months, you can start to work on more advanced methods of meditation like power-building, purpose-defining, or extreme-overcompensating. Understand that at first it will be very uncomfortable. That’s what changing is, uncomfortable. You are literally moving your comfort zone by trying anything new, and the only hope we have of improvement and success is to change what we’ve done so we can change what we’ve gotten.